Top 365 status for Whatsapp and Facebook | 2016

Here you found Every Day New or 365 Whatsapp Status and Facebook Status & Quotes.

1). Can I borrow a Kiss? I promise I’ll give it back.

2). Diet rule #1: If nobody sees you eating it, it doesn’t contain any calories.

3). The richer you get, the more expensive happiness becomes.

4). I m sorry did i give u d quite impression that i give a damn about u???

5). I miss the good old days when Black Friday was actually on Friday.

6). When Some One Hates You for no reason……………..Give them a reason !

7). Accept who you are. Unless you’re a serial killer.

8). “If you love two people at the same time, choose the second. Because if you really loved the first one, you wouldn’t have fallen for the second. – Johnny Deep 

9). People say me bad…..but trust me I am the worst.

10). The movie Titanic is a great lesson of why just the tip can get you in a lot of trouble.

11). When I drink alcohol… Everyone says I’m alcoholic. But… When I drink Fanta.. No one says I’m fantastic. ………

12). Take a deep breath it’s just a bad day, not a bad life.

13). I’ve been using Google for 10 years and I have no idea who uses the “I’m Feeling Lucky” button.

14). sometimes there is this moment when you feel like talking to someone….but you see around to find no one except your shadow….!!

15). All problems become smaller if you don’t dodge them but confront them.

16). Be polite to everyone don’t sweat the small stuff, and be positive-it’s contagious!

17). “Success” all depends on the second letter.

18). After Tuesday, even the calender says “W T F”.

19). Relationship Status: Looking for a WiFi connection.

20). I’d rather have honest enemies than fake friends.

21). ‘Black Friday Bowling’ Because those pins look A LOT like those bitches in front of me in line this morning!

22). Those who know love has also the risk of knowing pain.

23). I always learn from mistake of others who take my advice.

24). Born to Express not Impress

25). Whenever i think of quit smoking, I need a cigarette to think.

26). Flirting is the art of making a man feel pleased with himself.

27). SARCASM: Just one of the many services i offer.

28). Fall in love not in line.

29). Failure is not an option — it comes bundled with Windows.

30). I hate it when i ask “how are you?” just to be polite and end up getting a fucking life story.

31). You can disturb me any time if you don’t have time to do something.

32). We are on the same side Now. Four pegs at night will make me stringer

33). We live in the era of smart phones and stupid people.

34). If there is‘MONEY’….there is a million relatives and enemies.

35). Beauty Fades After Time, But my Personality Is Forever!

36). If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change. _ Wayne Dyer

37). I want the passion to loving me forever.

38). People are more what they hide than what they show

39). Wish My Parents were Like Google search. They Should Understand Me Even Before I Complete.

40). I have enough money to live comfortably for the rest of my life; if I die next Tuesday.

41). Love your girl like You love your hot Coffee… Enjoy it before its hotness goes.

42). If you love something, let it go. If it comes back, it was meant to be. If it does not, hunt it down & kill it.

43). Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband!

44). I am Neither Batman Nor Superman However i am superhero for my women..! 

45). Just thought a thought but the thought I thought wasn’t the thought I thought I thought.

46). I don’t make mistakes, I date them.

47). I love my job only when I’m on vacation

48). No one can be exactly like me. Even I have trouble doing it.

49). Behind every successful man there is a Passion and Hard work.

50). Sometimes life is too hard to Be alone… And Sometimes life is too good to be alone.

51). Don’t let a bad day make you feel like you have a bad life.

52). There are three sides to an argument – your side, my side and the right side.

53). Phones are better than girlfriends, At least we can switch off. 

54). Faces YOU Make ON The Toilet (o_o) (>_<) (0_0) (^_^).

55). Whatever it is — I didn’t do it!

56). The worst distance between two people is misunderstanding.

57). I speak my mind. I never mind what I speak.

58). I usually don’t get attached too easily, but that changes when I met you.

59). I hate when people look at my phone while I’m typing. It’s not that I have something to hide… It’s just none of their damn business :/

60). Love conquers all things let us too surrender to love.

61). One day you’re going to wake up and notice that you should’ve tried. It was worth the fight.    

62). Married couples who love each other tell each other a thousand things without talking.

63). We are all part of the ultimate statistic – ten out of ten die.

64). That moment when even Caps Lock can’t express your anger.

65). Time is always fly, but love is never died….. You and me make a wonderful WE.

66). Don’t Copy My Style.Or you will be prosecuted.

67). God made everything that has life, rest everything is made in China.

68). Don’t waste your time looking back on what you’ve lost. Just move on. 

69). If you don’t succeed at first, hide all evidence that you tried.

70). “Style is a way to say who you are without having to speak.” – Rachel Zoe

71). Anniversary is a time to celebrate the joys of today, the memories of yesterday, and the hopes of tomorrow.

72). On this our anniversary, we may not have wealth, but we do have each other and that is worth more than anything in the world.

73). They say “don’t drink and drive”. Well…. yesterday I was drinking a juice box while riding my tricycle. Yeah. I’m a badass.

74). You’ll never be lonely..If you learn to befriend yourself.

75). Make love, not war. Hell, do both. Get married.

76). Happy Thanksgiving to someone I’d have no problem stomping to death on Black Friday.

77). Dance like the photos are not being tagged. Love like you’ve never been non friended. Sing like nobody’s following. Share like you do care. And do it all like it wont end up on Whatsapp or fb!

78). I am single because God is busy writing the best love story for me…

79). Forget what hurt you in the past. But never forget what it taught you.

80). It’s hard to answer the question “what’s wrong?'” when nothing’s right.  

81). God made mud, God made dirt, God made guys so girls can flirt.

82). His story is History, My Story is Mystery.

83). I stopped fighting with my inner demons.

84). Love is just a word until you find the right person to show it to.

85). Not all men are fools, Some stay bachelor.

86). I can’t stop missing you.   

87). I really need a day in between Saturday and Sunday.

88). Life is Short – Chat Fast!

89). I have 2-3 real friends, the rest are just people i socialize with.

90). Night is a lovely gift by God to us to review our daily performances. Let’s cherish our good deeds and learn

from our bad experiences to face the next day with all the vigor and energy.

91). We must all make the choice between what is right and what is easy.

92). Lonely is not a feeling when you are alone. Lonely is a feeling when no one cares. I am not feeling lonely because my memories are with me!

93). The road to success is always under construction.

94). “”My attitude depends on the people in front of me….””

95). Yeah! My medical bills for the Black Friday store fights were less than what I saved! 

96). Sleep all your troubles away.

97). Dear iPhone, Please stop changing my rude words into nice ones. You piece of shut.

98). Every problem comes with a solution. If it doesn’t have any solution, it’s always a…………woman or girl :)

99). If everything is coming your way, you’re probably in the wrong Way.

100). Gravitation cannot be held responsible for people falling in love.

101). Knowledge is realizing that street is one-way, wisdom is looking in both directions anyway.

102). Don’t kiss behind the garden, Love is blind but the neighbors are not.

103). Don’t like me? Cool, I don’t wake up every day to impress you.

104). Be the type of person you want to meet..

105). Love is there when both person are more concerned for the other than for one’s self

106). A good friend will help you move, a best friend will help you move a dead body.

107). Wrestling is obviously fake. Why would two people fight over a belt when neither of them are wearing pants?

108). I like children. Properly cooked.

109). I always learn from mistakes of others, who took my advice.

110). Never test how deep the water is with both feet.

111). I’m not lazy, I’m on energy saving mode.

112). Yes, I agree. Mums can find everything. Except for the ringing phone in their bags!

113). There are two ways to live: you can lives as if nothing is a miracle or you can live as if everything is a miracle. – Albert Einstein

114). When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep — not screaming, like the passengers in his car”.

115). It’s not how we make mistakes, but how we correct them that define us.

116). Cell phones these days keep getting thinner and smarter… people the opposite.

117). Life is like a box of chocolates…I don’t think so! Mine is more like a box of hand grenades…pull the wrong pin and everything goes flying!

118). I wake up when I can’t hold my pee in any longer.  

119). I don’t even know why I like you. But I just do.

120). Close your eyes, clear your heart let it go.

121). Every day may not be good but there is something good in every day.

122). So i heard you’re a player, Well nice to meet you. I’m the coach.

123). I don’t need to explain myself damn it, I know I’m right.

124). Cleaning is just putting stuff in less obvious places.

125). Gravitation cannot be held responsible for people falling in love. – Student of Albert Einstein

126). I enjoy when people show Attitude to me because it shows that they need an Attitude to impress me!

127). The best way to create your future is to create it

128). Don’t Copy My Style.

129). but people stay in love by laughing with each other….

130). When I dream, I dream of you. Maybe one day, dreams will come true. Because, I really love you.

131). If at first, you don’t succeed..Keep flushing.

132). Time is precious, waste it wisely.

133). Nothing is perfect, but when I’m with you everything is perfect.

134). The only reason I am fat is because a tiny body couldn’t store all this personality.

135). Life is so much funnier when you have a dirty mind.

136). Every day is beautiful if you choose to see it. 

137). Do not be upset if you choose wrong people sometimes. Because without choosing them you will never know the true value of the right ones.

138). Flirting is a crime bcoz it turns into love without you knowing it.

139). You can never buy Love….But still you have to pay for it.

140). Don’t wait for last judgment. It happened every day.

141). Sometimes all you need is love. Lol, just kidding, you need money. :’).

142). Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it. Michael Jordan

143). Relationships are a lot like Algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?

144). The essence of romantic love is that wonderful beginning, after which sadness and impossibility may become the rule.

145). Do what you fear and fear disappears. – David Schwartz

146). I am only responsible for what I say, not for what you understand.

147). I love my job…when I am on my vacations.

148). People say, you can’t live without love…I think oxygen is more important.

149). My heart is just stolen…can I check your bra…….

150). My version of Black Friday is deleting all the people in my phone who sent me a ‘mass Thanksgiving text.’

151). Everybody knows how to love, but few people know how to stay in love with one person forever.

152). I don’t always lose my phone but when I do its always on silent.

153). I wish exams came with a 50/50 option.

154). And in the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years. – Abraham Lincoln

155). Stop worrying about the world ending today. It’s already tomorrow in Australia.

156). I am Neither Batman Nor Superman However i am superhero for my girl..!

157). Save water drink beer.

158). If you just help enough other people get what they need, you will get everything you need.

159). The ones who say “you can’t” and “you won’t” are probably the ones scared that “you will”.

160). If you are afraid of life, you are scared to live.

161). Anyone else sit on the toilet and play with their phone until you realized you have been finished 10 minutes ago?

162). I hates studying for exams, Is there an APP for that..?

163). When you drop your phone, your heart hits the ground before your phone does.

164). The past beats inside me like a second heart.

165). Saying someone is ugly doesn’t make you any prettier.

166). Hey there whatsapp is using me.

167). Keep calm and survive summer

168). It’s better to be alone than to be with bad company.

169). The task ahead of us is never as great as the power behind us.

170). In my house I’m the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.

171). “Whoever said that money can’t buy happiness, simply didn’t know where to go shopping.” – Bo Derek

172). I can’t go a day without thinking about you.

173). Results compulsorily require efforts. Efforts will not necessarily give results.

174). I wish dreams were like wishes, and wishes came true, cause in my dreams I’m always with you.

175). Just finished blocking some of numbers on whatsapp, if you can read this then you got lucky.

176). Virginity is not dignity, It is just lack of opportunity.

177). The only thing that will stop you from fulfilling your dream is you.

178). Sometimes you just need some space… to fart.

179). Dear math please grow up and solve your own problems, I’m tired of solving them for you.

180). One day you will wake up and there won’t be any more time to do the things you’ve always wanted. Do it now

181). Whatsapp: the only book teens read these days.

182). Your patience when you have nothing and your attitude when you have everything!

183). Black Friday shopping is not worth the risk of my life…

184). Love is blind but loving people is not mad  Never let any body come so close to your heart that it is painful to forget them.  

185). Sometimes you succeed…. and other times you learn.

186). Hey fat bitches, there’s this new lipstick that makes you lose weight. It’s called, super glue.

187). Life is rather like a tin of sardines – we’re all of us looking for the key. – Alan benett

188). That moment when a question on a test is so hard that even your inner voice is like “Fuck this shit lets work at McDonald’s”.

189). Better late than never, but never late is better.

190). I’m not slow….I’m at energy saving mode.

191). Don’t listen to what people say, watch what they do.

192). Giving up doesn’t always mean you are weak. Sometimes it just means your strong enough to let go.

193). Black Friday: Because only in America, people trample others for sales exactly one day after being thankful for what they already have.

194). I’ve found the recipe for happiness. Can someone just send me some money so that I can buy the ingredients?

195). Having one child makes you a parent, having two makes you a referee.

196). “”I don’t insult people , I just describe them””

197). “I know he’s a player, but I want to be the girl that he hangs up his jersey for and leaves the game”

198). she’s so fake, if you look behind her neck. I bet it says “Made in china”.

199). Attitude is everything!

200). Falling in love is only half of what I want. Staying in love with you till forever is the other.

201). I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I am saying.

202). Its Cute When your Crush’s Crush is You.

203). Fund love, found sadness at the end of the line. – Wyn Owen Justin

204). “”My attitude depends on the people in front of me….””

205). “””There is no market for YOUR EMOTIONS so never advertise your FEELINGS just display YOUR

ATTITUDE.,.'”

206). Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.

207). There is no finish line so love the journey.

208). Life will serve you best if you love it as much as you love yourself.

209). Why do parents get so upset about little things like goddamn I left a plate in the sink not a dead body.

210). When life puts you in tough situations, don’t say, why me? Just say, try me!

211). Find what you LOVE and let it kill you- Charles Bukowski

212). There are certain two types of human beings found on Whatsapp. One who gets enormous amount of messages and comments on their posts. And the obvious others are men.

213). 2 Things can change a women’s mood- 1) I love you 2) 50% Discount.

214). Everything is going to be fine..maybe not now but eventually….so be positive and think of after party

215). If women ruled the world there would be no wars. Just a bunch of jealous countries not talking to each other.

216). I dreamed a dream.

217). Need Love? … No… I would prefer vodka!

218). I’m pretty sure my prayers go directly to God’s spam folder.

219). I Wish My Parents Were Like Google. They Should Understand Me Even Before I Complete.   

220). Nothing is too small to know, and nothing is too big to attempt.

221). When ever I get a headache I always take two tablet of aspirin and keep away from children just like the bottle says.

222). “’Different” and ‘New’ is relatively easy. Doing something that’s genuinely better is very hard.” Sir Jony Ive, Apple

223). Always smile in front of people who hate you… Ur happiness kills them…

224). When you feel Like Giving up, remember why you held on for so long in the first place.

225). Sometimes I think to write LOL at the end of every answer in exams :)

226). I’m gonna rest of my life, the best of my life.

227). Hey I found your nose, it was in my business again.

228). Just finished blocking some numbers on whatsapp, if you can read this then you got lucky.

229). 80% of boys have girlfriends.. Rest 20% are having brain.

230). Nothing is over until you stop trying.

231). They say that love is more important than money, but have you ever tried to pay your bills with a hug?

232). Someone Asked me what is UR attitude…… then i simply replied… ” BEING SINGLE IS MY ATTITUDE…”

233). The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.

234). I’m not bossy. I just know what you should be doing.

235). I only want to be with you twice…now, and forever.

236). Here my dad comes on whatsapp… From now on my status would be ‘***no status***’ or just a smiley…     

237). It’s a good day to have a good day.

238). Was going to rob a bank today but the pen was chained to the desk.

239). “And in her smile I see something more beautiful than the stars.”

240). “Please don’t get confused between my personality & my attitude My personality is who I am & my attitude depends on who you are!”

241). A perfect marriage is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.

242). I’m not single, I’m just romantically challenged.

243). When everything comes your way.. Then you are on the wrong way.

244). I drink to make other people interesting.

245). Of course I’m not perfect; there’s a crack in my ass!

246). SCIENCE FACT: If you close your eyes, you won’t be able to see.

247). Today morning when I was driving my Ferrari, the alarm woke me up.

248). You know what boys & parking spaces have in common? The good ones are taken always and the only ones left are handicaps.

249). I’m not online, it’s just an optical illusion.

250). An Apple keep a day keeps the doctor away, I’m going to buy iPhone 6.

251). I need Six months of vacation, Twice a year.

252). Lοve is what Μakes two peοple sit in the Μiddle of Α bench when there Ιs plenty οf room at Βoth ends.

253). Hearts will never be practical until they are made unbreakable.

254). I speak my mind.And I never mind what I speak.

255). Parents spend first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.

256). Decided to burn lots of calories today so I set a fat kid on fire!

257). When a bird hits your window have you ever wondered if God is playing angry birds with you?   

258). Smile today, tomorrow could be worse.  

259). Love the neighbor. But don’t get caught.

260). Just because something isn’t happening for you right now doesn’t mean that will never happen.

261). A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

262). Two souls with but a single thought, two hearts that beat as one.

263). Anyone can catch your eye, but it takes someone special to catch your heart.

264). Marriage is a 3 Ring Circus- 1. Engagement Ring, 2. Wedding Ring, 3. Suffering.

265). “Please don’t get confused between my personality & my attitude My personality is who I am & my attitude depends on who you are!”

266). People fall in love by smiling at each other,

267). Marriage is a “workshop”, Where husband ‘works’ and wife ‘shops’.

268). When the moon winks at U tonight..I wish sweet dreams embrace U tight..Hope UR day was quite alright..& I wish U a lovely Good Night..!

269). What is the main reason for failure? …. I think its EXAMS.

270). All great changes are preceded by chaos 

271). Oh, for the good old days when people would stop Christmas shopping when they ran out of money. ~Author Unknown

272). Never give up on anybody Miracles happen every day!

273). I still cannot close my eyes and it’s too late; the reason is that every time we see each other I get very emotional and cannot stop thinking about you. Have a good night.

274). Every time I need you are right next to me, I feel like in the clouds when I look at you and I cannot say how much I love you my life

275). FREE PUPPIES: Half cocker spaniel, half sneaky neighbors dog.

276). Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.

277). I enjoy long romantic walks to the fridge.

278). You never know how strong you are, until being strong is the only choice you have.

279). You have to fight through some bad days to earn the best days of your life.

280). People say me bad…..trust me i am the worst.

281). When I count my blessings i count you twice.

282). I am so much better at text flirting than real flirting.

283). That’s the secret to life… replace one worry with another.

284). You are the thought in my dreams. U r the vision in my eyes.U r the sound in my ears.U r the words in my mouth.You’re everything I need. U r everything I want. You’re everything that makes me, me.

285). Falling in love is not a option. To stay in love is.

286). Parachute for sale, used once, never opened!!

287). If you’re texting two people at the same time, you are biTextual.

288). Thanks for changing my life completely. Beside you my lonely days are over. You have made my life happy.

289). God made coke. God made pepsi. God made me. Oh so sexy. God made rivers. God made lakes. God made you. Well…we all make mistakes.

290). Reading texts half asleep is like looking into the sun.  

291). No one rises suddenly in the World, Not Even the Sun.

292). I want to be your favorite hello and your hardest goodbye.

293). I tried to be normal once. Worst two minutes of my life.

294). Don’t ask what the meaning of life is. You define it.

295). I want to be the reason you look down at your phone and smile then walk into a pole. 

296). Stop checking my status ! Go Get A Life     

297). Someone else is happy with less than what you have.

298). There’s nothing wrong with you there’s a lot wrong with the world you live in- Chris Colfer

299). They say “don’t drink and drive”. Well…. yesterday I was drinking a juice box while riding my tricycle. Yeah. I’m a badass.

300). I don’t need to explain myself, I know I’m right.

301). Every new day is another chance to change something in your life every new day is a chance to feel blessed for what you have.

302). The best dreams happen when eyes are open.

303). It’s funny how all trust goes away when you can’t find the remote. ”Are you sitting on the remote?” No. ”Stand up”.

304). I’m not always ‘Available’ try your luck next time.

305). Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will. Born to express not to impress.

306). Etc. – End of Thinking Capacity.

307). Today’s moment is to be lived, shared and enjoyed so be the one who brings a little magic to others and have an awesome time doing it.

308). Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That’s why it’s called the present.

309). In today’s world, the key to success is to delete your Whatsapp account!

310). Trying to understand you is like trying to smell the color 9.

311). Our language is called the mother tongue because the father never gets a chance to Speak.

312). Love is like a fart, If you have to force it, It’s probably a crap.

313). You can’t hire someone else to do your push-ups for you. – -Jim Rohn

314). Don’t think of cost. Think of value.

315). I am not flirting. I am just being extra friendly to someone who is extra attractive.

316). The difference between pizza and your opinion is that I asked for pizza.

317). The main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing

318). A single word can undoubtedly be a repository of knowledge, provided you’re willing to learn something new.

319). Everything is fine in love and War.

320). A lot of people quit looking for work as soon as they find a job. – Zig Ziglar

321). Log kya kahange has killed more dreams than anything else.

322). I think Love is the best refreshment in life.

323). You don’t always get what you wish for. You get what you work for.

324). The Soul is a dream flower that opens only once in life.

325). I want to be the only hand you ever need to hold.

326). Just smile and smell good.

327). You have to be ODD, to be number ONE. 

328). If there is a “WILL”, there are 500 relatives.

329). Sometimes you need to distance yourself to see things clearly.

330). Life is 10% of what happens to you and 90% of how you deal with it

331). I’m a nice person i just hate everyone.

332). No matter what has happened. No matter what you’ve done. No matter what you will do. I will always love you. I swear it.

333). Some people call me Mike, you can call me tonight.

334). There is only happiness in this life, to love and be loved.

335). INSULT & WIFE Are Somewhat Similar in context….They Always Look Good…IF IT IS NOT YOURS…

336). I’m done begging for your love.

337). If you run into a wall. Don’t turn around and give up.

338). Dead or alive, you are coming with me.

339). Friends come and go, but enemies remain and build up.

340). If you make friends with yourself, you will never be alone.

341). I Am Not Special , I Am Just Limited Edition.

342). Here my dad comes on whatsapp… From now on my status would be ‘blank’ or just a smiley…

343). “Each moment of a happy lover’s hour is worth an age of dull and common life”

344). When inspiration does not come to me, I go halfway to meet it.

345). I want some one to give me a Loan and then leave me Alone.

346). Do what is “Right”, not what is “Easy”.

347). I am in a relationship with studies and it’s complicated. 

348). Smile in front of people who hate you… Ur happiness kills them…

349). In a few moments you would sleep, and would place your head on the pillow, I want to tell you that you’re my world, my love good night.

350). If you love something set it free.

351). When you get to the end of the rope, tie a knot and hang on. Theodore Roosevelt

352). Why am I so afraid to lose you when you’re not even mine?

353). My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.

354). I think you are suffering from a lack of vitamin me.

355). We’ve all done bad things, but that doesn’t make us bad people.

356). Sometimes all you need is love. Lol, just kidding, you need money. :’).

357). The only thing that ruins my day is taking a big crap after a shower.

358). Politeness has become so rare that some people mistake it for flirtation.

359). That moment when a question on a test is so hard that even your inner voice is like “Fuck this shit lets work at McDonald’s”.

360). May your problems be as few and as far apart as my Gma’s teeth.

361). My Attitude is my born gift and nobody take from me.

362). It’s funny how people judge other’s mistakes while they also do the same thing.

363). If you hurt my best friend, I will make your death look like an accident.

364). Is is true that Your Life is Boring? If answer is Yes….Then Type ‘I Love <ur bf=”” gf=”” name=””>’ And Send It To All Your Relatives! Your Life Won’t Be Boring Anymore! 

365). Love yourself. Love your day. Love your life.